On October 1st this year, Mr. Opposite and I headed on our first big vacation. And, on top of that it was my first trip to Europe ever! This trip consisted of seeing two of the worlds best cities, London and Paris, and it was amazing. From having beer in pubs that were opened in the 1500’s, to frolicking through Marie Antoinette’s village, this trip hands down was the trip of a lifetime.
Most women when they go to London and Paris they shop and shop like crazy. But because we were on a little bit of a budget, and because I never had been there before, we focused on three important things:
- Historical sites
In London we had amazing pub food, street peanuts, fish and chips, Italian and fancy shmancy food. While in Paris we had baguette, cheese, wine, baguette, croissants, macaroons, Italian, cheese and fancy shmancy food. We still think it’s funny that we had to have Italian food at some point while we were there. There’s just something about noodles and sauce that is necessary once per week – minimum. Anyway, while I was over the pond I noticed a few key things that we North Americans should consider:
- In London, there are peanuts everywhere. Seriously they are everywhere. Everything is nut-based and delicious. And with these public peanuts galore, not once did I see one dead child. Not one. It appears to me that the villainous peanut is not a villain in the UK and nobody is shamed for loving one of the most tasty nuts in the world. I don’t know how they avoided the nut allergy, but they did and they did it beautifully.
- It turns out, people have been misquoting Marie Antoinette for centuries. What’s that all about? It’s true, she didn’t say ‘let them eat cake,’ what she actually said was ‘let them eat gluten.’ And eat gluten, they do. People walk around with cakes, baguette and chomp away at the terrifying substance ALL DAY. Nobody walks around with a wheat belly and everybody seems relaxed. It must be that nobody is experiencing a carb-withdrawal-sugar-crash-psychotic episode. Oh and, Gluten Free is not an option anywhere. It was spectacular.
- Would you like some dairy on that? Yes. Yes I would. Sure put lots of butter on my food. Butter it up. The crazy thing about Paris/London is that I was eating all these things that typically make me feel like a sausage on a barbeque, but I’m pretty sure because of their better farming and less chemicals in everything, I didn’t feel sick. Not once. And I was eating gluten like crazy, and also I’m pretty sure I consumed at least four blocks of cheese. Minimum. Mmmm.
So people, I think it’s time we once again take a lesson from our older siblings from the mother lands, and that we chill the f-out. That is all.
Confession: we also ate Mc.D’s once. Please don’t judge. We were starving after walking around Versailles for 6 hours. And, just so you know, their Big Mac actually tasted like meat. Even their McDonald’s is better.