Religion is a confusing subject. Is God real? What name does He prefer? Does He have a beard? Is He actually a She? Is the G-man gender neutral? And, don’t even get me started about Jesus. That’s a whole ‘nother can of worms. The only thing I truly know for sure, is that if there is a God, He’s probably pretty decent, and He definitely doesn’t hate fags. Unless you’re referring to cigarettes. He probably hates them because they’ve been tainted with so many corporate chemicals. So, who does God actually hate? Well, I can’t say for sure, but below is a list of people that I’d put money on that God probably hates, and at best, severely dislikes them or is really really really disappointed in them:
- People who actively stand in the way of human happiness and human rights. For example, members of the Westboro Church, people who vote against equal rights, health care, equal marriage, and human equality as a whole. I hate to say it, but God probably hates you. He’s definitely disappointed in you.
- Racists and homosexualists (not using the term homophobic anymore because it’s not fear, it’s uneducated hate mixed in with some assholeness). Here’s the thing, the internet exists so you can educate yourself and no longer live in the twisted views of the older generations who didn’t know any better because they were scared and didn’t much access to information. It’s 2013 people. Get a clue. I’m not sure if I think that God probably hates you, but he’s definitely disappointed in you.
- Terrorists. Injuring civilians for the sake of making a statement, causing fear and inducing terror. Yup, God probably hates you too.
- Greed worshipers. If the your purpose in life is to get rich no matter what expense, ie. causing unemployment, destroying the environment, causing physical harm, and total disregard of the health of the people, odds are God probably hates you. But then again, maybe you don’t really care because you’ve already signed a contract that terminated your soul? I don’t know.
- Religious leaders and shady politicians who prey on vulnerable people getting to do bad things, believe false facts, all while growing your personal wealth and/or ‘reputation’. You’re just using your power for your own benefit. God totally wouldn’t agree with that.
- Hate crimers. To hurt someone because they are of a different race, or bats for a team you don’t approve of is not ok. Your views are not better than theirs. Your skin is not nicer than theirs. And, your hate does not make you righteous. You’re not making the world better by hurting them. You’re making it worse and you look like a complete and total jerkstore. So, I’d bet (probably even double down) that God probably hates you.
- Serial killers. I don’t have to tell you. I’m sure you already know your deal with the big man upstairs and that red devil down stairs.
- Rapists. Sex is a consensual act. Rape is not. Sex is good. Rape is bad. This is one of the most terrible things you can do to another human being. I mean, wouldn’t you want the person your sexing to want it too? And since you have a total disregard towards humanity, respect and kindness, God probably hates you.
- Violent assholes. Like the people who killed my friend Chris Skinner. Just so you know, God probably hates you.
- War mongers. You know who you are. He probably hates you too.
- Anti-sex-educationists. You really think that only teaching kids about abstinence is the smart way to go? You’re taking away these kids rights to have a safe and healthy teenhood followed by adulthood. So, while God may not probably hate you, he’s probably big time disappointed in you.
- Educators at gay-reform schools. What’s that all about? You can’t pray the gay away people. You’re just causing psychological damage. Let people love who they want to love. Holding someone back from who they were born to be is pretty awful. I bet God is super mad about that.
- Child molesters. I don’t care if you’re a priest of any religion. God definitely hates you. Oh and people who hurt poor defenseless animals. Hates them too.
So, if you or someone you know are any of the above, did you ever think that maybe you’re on the wrong side of history? And that maybe we were all put on this earth to make it a little better for not just yourself but for everyone. Instead of living your life so filled with hate, greed and terror, maybe think about doing the right thing. The decent thing. The kind thing. And then, maybe this world wouldn’t be so scary and wouldn’t be so unjust.
Political, religious rant complete.
NOTE: On the weekend I realized that I missed one. Fox News Contributors. God probably hates you. For sure he probably hates you.