To my mom, brother, dad, boyfriend’s family, etc…maybe you shouldn’t read this one? Typically, I don’t write about sex, but many of my girlfriends have been having this conversation so I thought it was time for me to talk too much about it.
When people find themselves in the first stage of falling in love, there’s this chemical imbalance between both partners in which they officially transform into jack rabbits. One day they are human, and the next day, they are Mr. and Mrs. Humper and Humpette Jack Rabbit. And because of this, for a while, Mr. and Mrs. Jack Rabbit completely disappear from the normal world, bail on their friends, plans, and responsibilities because they are too busy testing their mattress springs, couch springs, counter springs – wait counters don’t have springs… you get the point.
Anyway, they lose all sense of reality and become a couple of horny toads, until that is, the chemical levels in their brains level out and they realize that the sex won’t stop happening so their incessant need to ‘do it’ as if they’re never going to get another chance is diminished. Plus, by that point, they’ve almost lost all of their friends from being completely non-existent and they’ve started to look like a junky because sleeping has been replaced with monkey love.
It’s at this point, when the couple starts finding other things to do outside of the bedroom and the 20-30 times a week is substantially dropped to a number much more sustainable.
But what is that number? What is the right amount of sex to have? Is it once a day? Is it twice a day? Is it 3-7 times a week? Why is there no answer? What’s that all about? If there’s no such thing as a normal sex life because everyone is different and everyone has different wants and desires, then how are we suppose to know if our 3-7 times a week, or once a week, or 500 times a month is normal?
Anyway, after doing my research (I googled once), I have come to the conclusion that no amount of sex is normal. I guess it’s about finding that amount that both parties are comfortable with and going for it – literally. I’m sure my friend Kristen Mark will chime in (she’s a super duper sex researcher) right about now…