Dear Mini Me,
I miss you terribly. I can remember a time when I’d wake up in the morning and know that whatever I, Mini Me, was going to put on that day, it was going to feel fantastic. I remember not muffin topping over my jeans and I remember being able to put on a bikini, not feeling as though I needed to wear a sign around my neck that said ‘not pregnant, just fat’. I remember this. I miss this.
At first Mini Me, you showed signs of leaving me, and then, for the last 8-10ish months, you completely vanished. What’s that all about? It’s awful.
I was wondering dear, sweet Mini Me, if you could do me a favour and come back. I do realize that I’ve let you down and have become another North American couch potato and I’m very, very, sorry. But, most of all sorry that I’ve let you down.
So, with this Mini Me, I’m going to make a promise to my current self and to you so that, dear friend, you will finally return to me and we can live happily ever after:
- Being ‘over 30’ is not an excuse to let yourself go. Remember this.
- Poutine is something that should NOT be consumed more than once a week. Oops.
- Walking around the office does not count as your daily exercise. Get up and do something…anything really.
- Common…let’s twist again, like you did last summer. When you were dancing you looked your best, so get back on that dance floor.
- Drink water. Sometimes you think you’re hungry but, you’re really not, you’re just so darn thirsty.
- Treats aren’t treats if they happen everyday or more than everyday. That’s just gluttony.
- Cheese doesn’t need to go on everything. Most things, but not everything.
- Tell yourself you’re skinny. To be skinny, you need to think skinny, otherwise you’ll rationalize eating bad things because you already feel fat.
And with that, so long Mini Me, I’m anxiously awaiting your return.