A friend of mine (ha – the irony) from another Ad Agency, read Men and Woman Can’t Be Friends – Pt. 1 and decided to send me the male perspective. He’s really funny, has lots of girl friends, and understands the trickiness that is a male/female friendship.
That said, I think this series will be a 3 part series so you can expect to read one more on Men and Woman Can’t Be Friends after this. The next post will be a series of scenarios in which you can actually be friends.
The Male Perspective
Men and women can be friends…for a while. Eventually, as proven by science, one of the two idiots will develop “feelings”. And by “feelings”, I mean the all-consuming, brain-mucking desire to penetrate the other. Typically, this is the male, but you never really know nowadays. What’s that all about?
I’ve been friends with a lot of girls (because frankly, women rule) and every time our friendship has bottomed out because either A. I wanted more from them, or B. they wanted more from me. I don’t really believe in hooking up with friends because, well, a friend is supposed to be the person you tell about awkward, ill-advised sex – not the one you have it with. I guess one could propose that in the name of efficiency the later makes sense…but I’ve never had success in making that argument. In the same vein, I also don’t believe in being a sucker. At least, not for long.
[suhk-er], noun: the pathetic, most likely sickeningly nice male who’s only role is to fill the gap (so to speak) between post-dinner drinks and her ensuing alcohol-fueled-sex-romp with mister wrong.
What I do wholeheartedly believe, and maybe this is taking the subject in a different direction than initially intended, is that guys and girls can be friends FIRST before developing an intimate relationship. There’s something nice about having respect for someone before you defile him or her in the bedroom.
Sure, there is a chance this may end things, but way more mix-breed friendfests have been ruined by ambiguity and drunken “one time things” than they have from legitimate attempts at a relationship. Oh god, I just made myself sick.
Anyway, to comment on the post by Jen, I’ve found being friends with someone who is in a relationship to actually be easier. At least both people know their role…(unless they work in advertising because there is no such thing as trust in this sport.) Yes, you may not get to spend as much time together, but it’s almost better that way. It gives the odd one out more of a chance to find their match and, I don’t know, be happy? Which is what life is all about anyway. That, and drinking. Lots and lots of drinking.
– Anonymous male idiot